A colloquy of St Dorotheus
The reason for all disturbance is that no-one blames himself |
---|
My
brethren, let us consider how it can happen so often that someone hears
something unpleasant and goes away untroubled, as if he had not heard
it; and yet sometimes he is disturbed and troubled as soon as he hears
such words. What is the cause of this inconsistency? Is there one reason
for it or many? I recognise several, but one in particular is the
source of all the others. As someone has put it: it all comes from the
person’s state of mind at the time.
If someone is engaged in prayer or contemplation, he
can easily take a rebuke from his brother and be unmoved by it. Or
again, his affection toward a brother may be a strong reason; love bears
all things with the utmost patience. Yet another reason may be
contempt: if a person despises the one who is trying to trouble him, and
acts as if he is the vilest of all creatures and considers it beneath
his dignity even to look at him, or to answer him, or to mention the
affront and insults to anyone else, he will not be moved by his words.
All in all, then, no-one is disturbed or troubled if
he scorns and disregards what is said. But on the other hand, it is also
possible for someone to be disturbed and troubled by his brother’s
words, either because he is not in a good frame of mind, or because he
hates his brother. There are a great number of other reasons as well.
Yet the reason for all disturbance, if we look to its
roots, is that no one finds fault with himself. This is the reason why
we become angry and upset, why we sometimes have no peace in our soul.
We should not be surprised, since holy men have taught us that there is
no other path to peace but this.
We see that this is true in so many other people; and
yet we hope, in our laziness and desire for peace, we hope or even
believe that we are on the right path even when we are irritated by
everything and cannot bear to accept any blame ourselves.
This is the way things are. However many virtues a man
may have – they could be innumerable, they could be infinite – if he
has left the path of self-accusation he will never have peace: he will
be afflicted by others or he will be an affliction to them, and all his
efforts will be wasted.
If we say we have no sin in us, we are deceiving ourselves,* but if we acknowledge our sins, then God, who is faithful and just, will forgive our sins.
He who conceals his faults will not prosper,* but if we acknowledge our sins, then God, who is faithful and just, will forgive our sins.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.